John McCain Uses Swift Boaters He Once Condemned

By now, many of you may have heard the remarks of General Wesley Clark about his belief that John McCain's war record does not equate itself to experience in the job of Commander In Chief. If not, I'll put the FULL comment, in context, at the bottom of this entry.

But it is less General Clark's comments that have me shaking my head and more John McCain's response to them.

In 2004, John McCain strongly condemned the 527 Swift Boat Veterans for Truth, in very unequivocal terms. Quoting from The San Francisco Chronicle, Friday, August 6, 2004.

"It was the same kind of deal that was pulled on me," McCain said, referring to attacks on his military record during the 2000 Republican primary race by supporters of Bush. At the time, Kerry and other senators who served in Vietnam came to McCain's defense. Kerry and McCain also worked together in the 1990s on resolving the question of American soldiers missing in action in Vietnam, which led to normalized relations between the countries.

"I deplore this kind of politics," McCain told the Associated Press. "I think the ad is dishonest and dishonorable.

And yet, who did Senator McCain bring to his aid to defend him against this opinion of Gerneral Clark's? Senator Kerry perhaps, in recognition of the fact that the two men had both been attacked as regards whether their military records qualified them to make logistical and political decisions concerning warfare? That would be consistent and logical, seeing that Kerry defended McCain in 2000 and McCain defended Kerry in 2004.

No. John McCain produced fellow POW Colonel Bud Day. This would not in itself be a problem were it not for the fact that Day is one of the men McCain so roundly criticized. Colonel Day was one of the members of Swift Boat Veterans for Truth and appeared in a national television ad for them. He also once said of John Kerry, the man who came to John McCain's defense in 2000,

"My view is he basically will go down in history sometime as the Benedict Arnold of 1971."

Day quickly proceeded to get up to old tricks, criticizing General Clark's own time in Vietnam.

Mr. McCain, I am appalled at your choice of spokesmen. If this is indicative of the type of "honorable" and "loyal" behavior we can expect from you now that you are the Republican candidate instead of the maverick outsider, then I consider you no better on the subjects of honesty and honor than the man you seek to replace in office.

Your judgement, sir, is very seriously flawed.

Oh, and by the way... I also find it appalling that I have paid all my property taxes to the County of San Diego in a timely manner while you let yours fall into default the last few years. This does not speak well of your ability to follow up on delegated responsibilities. That a presidential candidate should neglect to make certain his own taxes or those of his family had been paid speaks of the kind of neglectful oversight used as an excuse by President Reagan during Iran-Contra. Sir, did you actually learn nothing from your negative experience as one of the "Keating Five"?

If you can't be bothered to do it yourself, at least hire someone competent to do it for you.

Here are General Clark's comments from CBS' Face The Nation:

Bob Schieffer: Well you, you went so far as to say that you thought John McCain was, quote, and these are your words, "untested and untried," And I must say I, I had to read that twice, because you're talking about somebody who was a prisoner of war. He was a squadron commander of the largest squadron in the Navy. He's been on the Senate Armed Services Committee for lo these many years. How can you say that John McCain is un- untested and untried? General?


GENERAL WESLEY CLARK: Because in the matters of national security policy making, it's a matter of understanding risk. It's a matter of gauging your opponents, and it's a matter of being held accountable. John McCain's never done any of that in his official positions. I certainly honor his service as a prisoner of war. He was a hero to me and to hundreds of thousands and millions of others in Armed Forces as a prisoner of war. He has been a voice on the Senate Armed Services Committee, and he has traveled all over the world. But he hasn't held executive responsibility. That large squadron in Air- in the Navy that he commanded, it wasn't a wartime squadron. He hasn't been there and ordered the bombs to fall. He hasn't seen what it's like when diplomats come in and say, 'I don't know whether we're going to be able to get this point through or not. Do you want to take the risk? What about your reputation? How do we handle it-'

Bob Schieffer: Well-

GENERAL WESLEY CLARK: ' -it publicly.' He hasn't made those calls, Bob.

Great Article At Publisher's Weekly

Slowly but surely, the waves of erotica and erotic romance are pounding the cliffs placed in front of us to sand. As in any other business, it's the money that is first getting the attention of the so-called "legitimate" publishers and the talent that is then keeping their eyes open.

Publisher's Weekly recently posted this very informative and interesting article,The New E in Erotica . Sure, it's not so new to many of us...but it is nice to see the "big boys" recognizing that their ankles are being bitten. New artistic forms of expression have always fought this battle.

A key quote, in my eyes:
"The consumers were far ahead of me,” says Kate Duffy, editorial director at Kensington, which launched its erotica imprint, Aphrodisia, in 2006. “For years I thought of e-publishing as something people did because they couldn't publish with us. But then we started seeing all of these stellar talents that had first been e-published. It wasn't that the books were in any way inferior—that was my prejudice. It was a different way of accessing consumers, and it would behoove me to investigate.”

Sharing The Blogosphere

Today I'm guest blogging over at fantasy author Sandy Lender's blog Today The Dragon Wins. Sandy has invited authors throughout the month of June to come in and talk about their pen name and she offered me a slot that I gladly accepted.

Please stop by and check out not only what I had to say but some of the great stories from other authors that have appeared there this month.

We Teach This To Children, But Hillary Doesn't Get It

It is called good sportsmanship.

We teach it in Little League and on the playground and in Pop Warner. We expect our athletes to exhibit it. We expect it from the losers at the Oscars. We have every right to expect it from a candidate for President.

Hilary doesn't seem to get the concept. She is still trying to be a cheerleader for Team Clinton. Hillary, the Homecoming Game is over. Your team is behind by a touchdown and a field goal and the gun has sounded. All the "go, fight, win" is over. Oh, and Michelle won Homecoming Queen. But you are on the court. Okay?

"No decision will be made here tonight?" Hillary, who decides to lose? Does any competitive person ever decide to lose? It just happens. The game is over. The final buzzer sounded, the bottom of the ninth is finished and we are not tied. You lost.

Now you are supposed to meet the winner at center court and shake hands over the net.

Last year, the football team I dearly love lost the AFC Championship game. This happened largely because of factors beyond their control. Their best player was injured on the second play of the game. Their quarterback was playing on a knee that required surgery immediately after the season. They were playing a team that had cheated and videotaped their defensive signals and received a slap on the wrist for it. The coach, Norv Turner, knew all this. The team played hard but the other team scored more points and won the game. That is the nature of competition. What did Norv do?

Did Norv refuse to shake Bill Belichick's hand because he had been caught cheating? Did he track down the referee and scream about the Chargers being victimized? Did he petition the league to put the points on the scoreboard that LaDainian Tomlinson and Philip Rivers would have scored if they were healthy? No. He went to midfield and shook the other coach's hand. Then he praised the effort and commitment of both teams in his press conference.

Erica Jong came out today and talked about her horrible disappointment in the result of the race. In a piece at The Huffington Post she basically defends Hillary's lack of sportsmanship and says a man would be treated differently. Yeah, a man would be eviscerated this morning instead of being seen as still playing the game. Sorry Erica, it doesn't excuse Ms. Clinton's behavior.

Let's compare that to Barack Obama's words last night about Hillary:
That is particularly true for the candidate who has traveled further on this journey than anyone else. Senator Hillary Clinton has made history in this campaign not just because she’s a woman who has done what no woman has done before, but because she’s a leader who inspires millions of Americans with her strength, her courage, and her commitment to the causes that brought us here tonight.

Who is showing good sportsmanship and admirable behavior between these two?

My son played a little league playoff game last Saturday. They lost, 3-2 in extra innings. My son was very upset. They had only got to extra innings because he had thrown out a guy attempting to steal and then got a base hit with two out, stole second and, on an infield pop fly, ran like hellhounds were on his tail for home plate. The ball dropped, he scored the tying run and he celebrated like a boy does. Pure joy.

In extra innings, his teams pitcher walked the first guy and they moved him from catcher to pitcher. He got a strikeout and then the new catcher let a ball go by and the runner at first went to second. Facing the other team's best player, my son got two strikes on him and tried to finish the job. The kid hit a clean shot to the outfield. Game over.

My son shook the hand of every member of the winning team.

He had every reason to blame others. He didn't. He told me, "Dad, I served it up to him. It was right down the middle." Mind you, in Little League we just want them to throw strikes, not nibble the corners. But my son didn't cry or whine, or say he had decided the game wasn't over. He took responsibility for his own actions, refused to blame others and was gracious in defeat. I was and am incredibly proud of him.

Hillary Clinton, you could learn a lot from my ten year old boy.

AP Says Obama Has Clinched

According to research by the Associated Press, Barack Obama has achieved the 2,118 pledged delegates necessary to gain the Democratic Party nomination for President.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080603/ap_on_el_pr/primary_rdp

Further reports are that Hillary Clinton will concede this at a speech in New York this evening, with unidentified sources saying that she will let her campaign end, with workers paid through June 15th. It is said that in her speech she will only concede the factual delegate numbers, not the nomination. However, the ending of the financial and business processes would indicate that she is conceding the nomination.

If true, this will effectively allow the Democrats to begin the healing and regrouping process well in advance of the convention.

Barack Obama beat the oddsmakers predictions just getting through Super Tuesday. Now we are set for a Presidential race that may dramatically alter the public face of politics in this country. If Obama runs the type of campaign in the fall that he ran in the spring, and if the American public rejects McCain's politics of destruction, distraction and fear as they did Clinton's attempts to use those tactics, we will have a campaign that will not only be far more ethical, but far more inspiring and educational.

Imagine, a campaign that could actually have fourth graders once again telling their teachers they want to grow up to be president. I like the sound of that.

Will Belegon at The Erotic Woman

In another example of my staggering ability to accomplish something and then completely forget about it, my story The Doubledare Hotel is now online and available to read for FREE at The Erotic Woman. I sold this story to them back in January and just completely forgot to keep an eye on when it would post.

So if you have time for a little interlude and want to read the story of a woman surprising her significant other in a way he'll never forget, follow the link and check it out!

(It is, of course, erotica and is intended for audiences over the age of 18.)

Reaching New Lows In Media: Rachel Ray Is a Terrorist?

Oh come on now....

Dunkin Donuts has pulled an ad featuring Rachel Ray after pressure because the Food Network TV star was wearing a scarf that looked "too Arab".

What? What is this, an episode of The Simpsons? D'oh!

According to the Boston Globe:

"Some observers, including ultra-conservative Fox News commentator Michelle Malkin, were so incensed by the ad that there was even talk of a Dunkin’ Donuts boycott.

‘‘The keffiyeh, for the clueless, is the traditional scarf of Arab men that has come to symbolize murderous Palestinian jihad,’’ Malkin yowls in her syndicated column."

So, black and white paisley equals terrorist garb now? The only thing scarier then that is the idea that the Bushinator might use it as an excuse to throw somebody in Guantanamo.

Really Michelle? You want to talk clueless? How about talking plain old dumb? How dumb do you have to be to think that the American public is so freakin' stupid that they can't tell the difference between Arafat and Rachel Ray? Here's a hint; one of them is dead and the other makes her living talking about America's food indulgences while distinctly NOT wearing a burkha. Rachel Ray is even a sex symbol of sorts, in that grand American tradition of mixing two of life's greatest pleasures.

Get a grip. Contribute to the intelligent side of things for once, otherwise you're going to be out of a job when you succeed in dumbing down the atmosphere of the country enough that people don't learn to read.

Of course, even you aren't as bad as the Roswell Beacon. They actually published a cover showing Barack Obama with crosshairs and talking about the security needs to keep him from being assassinated. Something Hillary has been hinting at and something disgracefully referenced by veteran newswoman Liz Trotta at Fox. (YouTube link:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BjYpkvcmog0) That last one is disgusting. Oh, and she apologized the next day at the tail end of other comments. Yeah, we believe that you are really sorry. Do you really expect us to believe that was an innocent mistake? Even if it were, the fact that you foolowed your "slip" by saying, "well, both if we could."

So there is our level of intelligent discourse this week, friends. Rachel Ray is a terrorist according to Michelle Malkin and the shooting of Barack Obama would be a good idea according to Liz Trotta. Thanks, ladies. In the name of equality, thanks for proving that you don't have to be male to sound as idiotic as Rush Limbaugh (News for you though, Ann Coulter got there first.)

CA Supreme Court Does The Right Thing

I would like to take a moment to stand on my soapbox and give the California Supreme Court a loud and long standing ovation.

The California Supreme Court has overturned the ban on gay marriage!

Today, in a historic decision, the State of California has become only the second to uphold the basic rights of it's gay and lesbian citizens. We are the first to not require that you are a resident.

In a 4-3 decision, the Republican dominated Court declared that a law banning same-sex marriages violated the constitutional right to equal protection under the law for all citizens. Even the dissenting opinion was in agreement that the laws were discriminatory, with those three who voted against framing their argument not as a disagreement in purpose but in jurisdiction, saying that it should be decided by voters.

Opponents immediately declared that they would attempt to put a constitutional amendment on the ballot. Of course. That's expected.

It doesn't change the reason we have to celebrate today.

And just to remind the haters... I am a white heterosexual middle-aged male with a college-degree and two children. I attended an Episcopalian grade school and a Catholic high school and graduated from a Presbyterian university. This is not a religious issue. It's a human rights issue.

Help Other's While Helping Yourself

With the recent cyclone and the horrible devastation and loss of life in Myanmar, the power of mother nature is once again being slammed home to us. In addition to the efforts of Ann Aquirre at her blog, Coming Together and Phaze are offering another way to help people affected by storms world wide with a re-emphasis on Coming Together:Special Hurricane Relief Edition.

The Special Hurricane Relief Edition was originally published in response to Hurricane Katrina, but the American Red Cross is also working to help the affected in Burma. Thus Phaze thought it appropriate to remind everyone of the availability of this volume and to give you a major incentive to buy it and add to the help being sent despite the regrettable ineptitude of the Myanmar government.

Phaze is generously offering a coupon for 50% off a future Phaze purchase when you buy the e-book or 75% off a future purchase when you order the paperback. In order to receive the coupon, you must order directly from the Phaze website. Here is a link to the page (scroll down below For The Cure)for the Special Hurricane Relief Edition to make it easier.

In addition, if you order this from the Phaze website and let me know at willbelegon@yahoo.com, I will happily mail you a pair of bookmarks and an autographed label to place in your copy of Coming Together. (Obviously, I will need a mailing address..)

Thank you for Coming Together to help those less fortunate...

Happy Mother's Day From Phaze!

Phaze would like to wish all you mom's out there a very Happy Mother's Day in recognition of all the things you do for us every day of the year!

So for today only, Sunday May 11, 2008, all Phaze books are 20% off at Phaze.com. Simply enter the code HOTMAMA at checkout and you will receive your 20% discount.

After all, every mom deserves a break today and a chance to spend some time lost in a good book...

Come Together With Ann Aquirre to Help Cyclone Victims

You will have heard of Cyclone Nargis, which hit Myanmar (formerly known as Burma) on May 2nd. What you may not have heard about is how staggering the loss of life has been in a very densely populated and not very developed part of the world.

Some estimates now rate the eventual death toll at 100,000. As many as 40% of those are said to be children. Presently reported numbers are 22,890 fatalities with at least 42,119 missing. What's worse, ruptured sewage lines are reported to have ruined much of the rice crop in the most heavily affected areas. This will have even more disastrous consequences in the coming months. Aid workers that have been allowed in by the junta government of Myanmar are reporting that homeless peoples could number as high as 3 million. Yes, million.

In response to a question about what was needed, Red Cross spokesman Matt Cochrane said, "Everything." UK charity Save The Children has also been active and is one of the few organizations being allowed in by the Burmese government.

Author Ann Aquirre has started a contest on her blog to give away a $150.00 gift certificate to the book store of your choice if you will simply make a donation and show her that you have made it. Author and Editor of the Coming Together charity anthologies Alessia Brio then added $50.00 to bring it to $200.00.

Please, use this as incentive to help if you possibly can. At the very least, take a few moments to offer your support by spreading the word or sending a kind word in the direction of Ann and also Alessia.

As hard as things are for many in our present economic situation, it is far worse in Burma. Please help.

An Even Split on May 6th? No, Look Again.

So here we are, approaching midnight on the West Coast and the votes are pretty much counted in North Carolina and Indiana. Obama won in N.C. and Hillary in Indiana. So it's a split decision, right? They both won one, so they are even.

Wrong.

Barack Obama won 56% to 42% over Hillary in North Carolina. But the picture on the top of Yahoo's political news page? Right, the former first lady, with a story about her winning Indiana. And that is all some people will see it as... that she won. But lets look at the numbers.

According to the Associated Press, with 99% of the vote counted in Indiana, Hillary won 51% to 49%. A margin of slightly more than 22,000 votes out of 1.2 million. So, if you think your vote doesn't count, the clear message here is to move to Indiana. However, what's not clear is why this eked out win should propel Mrs. Clinton to say, "Thanks to you, it's full speed to the White House!"

Really? Because North Carolina is the tenth largest state in the nation. There were 115 delegates at stake. And Obama, not to be too mean about it, kicked your ass. He wiped the floor with you. Meanwhile, you barely achieve a victory in a state that was always being counted on by your own campaign, and you do it by trumpeting a "gas tax holiday" that some observers have analyzed as meaning approximately $28 to the average American family. Hey, at least when W tries to buy me off he has the cojones to offer me $600 bucks. I mean, that will at least buy me a Playstation 3. Your deal won't even buy me a game to play on it.

Also, the gas tax holiday was already tried. In Illinois, and one of its supporters was Barack Obama. The 5% reduction in taxes there resulted in a 3% drop in the price. In other words, the reduction of income to the state and to public good created a 2% increase in the profits of the oil companies. And at the end of the tax holiday, gas prices went up 4%.

Gee... no wonder the guys from Shell praised the plan.

So at the end of the day, the latest projections are that Obama has gained at least 94 delegates and Clinton at least 75. With 18 more to still be decided. Do the math. Even if Hillary gets all 18 she ends up with 93. (And she won't... if the current ratios hold, Obama will get at least 10 or 11.)

That's not an even split... that's Barack Obama pulling away as we enter the homestretch.

The Myth of White Voters and Obama

Let's get something straight, right now.

I am a straight, white middle-aged democrat and I am voting for Barack Obama.

All the campaign rhetoric that keeps coming from Fox News and Rush Limbaugh and company about how white voters won't support Barack Obama? Please. Consider the sources of your information. Outside the actual Clinton campaign, who is out there saying that whites won't vote for Obama?

The Republicans, and their shills. And they are saying it for the purpose of keeping Hillary in the race. Does this not speak to anyone out there who wants a democratic victory in November? Look, if you are a sports fan and your team is already in the Championship game... and you are watching to see who you will match up with... who are you rooting for? The team that you think will beat you? Or the team you think you will beat?

Right. The Republicans and their puppets want the person they think they can beat. Unless there is something out there really horrible that none of us know about, Obama just got hit in the chops with THE knockout blow. Rev. Wright is to Barack Obama as the Monkey Business is to Gary Hart, as Willie Horton is to Michael Dukakis.

And guess what? Obama rolls on. It has hurt him, but it hasn't destroyed him. This scares the Republicans to death. It screams to them of the term "Teflon" as it was applied to their sainted Ronald Reagan.

So now, they and the Clinton's are playing the race card. White voters won't vote for a black man.

They use Ohio and Pennsylvania to try and prove it. Two places Clinton should have won. And she did. But the real interesting thing is not that she won... she was expected to win those states. What's interesting is her margin of victory. Hillary Clinton was up by 25 points in Pennslyvania only a few months before. Obama made up almost two thirds of the lead, almost double what he eventually lost by. And now, there are people and polls that are hinting he actually has a shot to win Indiana tomorrow, which should have been as much of a shoe-in as Pennsylvania was...

The real facts, according to the New York Times, is that Obama is treading water with white democrats. Meanwhile, Hillary is going down for the third time in the African American community. Follow the link, look at the graph. Then find a white democrat and ask the question.

I'm a white democrat and I'm supporting Barack Obama.

Back From RT, Minus One Bag

Romantic Times went very well in many ways this year. I got filmed for a documentary that was interested in me as a male writer in a female-dominated field, I was interviewed and quoted by the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette and my buttons were a hit. Alessia and I had a book given away in the freebie room and were pleased when all 100 copies got scarfed up and some people even sought us out to sign them.

I met several people I'd been looking forward to meeting, such as Barry Eisler and Elaine from Coffee Time Romance and The Dark Castle Lords. I got to know some people better that I only briefly met last year, like Samantha Kane. I got to meet great new people like Larry from Torquere and Erika. I got brief introductions to people I hope to get to know better, like Caprice Crane and Alexandra Sokoloff. And of course I partied and enjoyed the time with Lillian Feisty, Eden Bradley, Christina Cross, Tawny Taylor and my dear partner Alessia Brio.

The only thing bad about it was the return. Not just leaving my friends, but troubles and inconsistency with the airlines. First, the airline website said my flight was delayed. This created anxiety about making my connection in Minneapolis. Then, we took off on time with the original schedule and even made up time in the air, arriving early. Obviously, that isn't a bad thing. I don't mind having an hour and a half to make my connection instead of 45 minutes. But it does add to the inconsistency portion.

That time ended up being a positive, since the tram was broken down in Minneapolis. But I made it to my connection in plenty of time. I called my mom and told her we were on schedule, or just behind it, and it looked like we would arrive in San Diego just after 11 p.m. as planned, then got on board. And sat while a thunderstorm passed. We backed away from the gate late. We taxied and sat on the tarmac. Eventually we made it into the air.

And I arrived in San Diego safe and sound, if a bit late. My mom had to wait a while, but she was understanding, despite the witching hour being upon us. I told her by phone I would be out as soon as I got my bags. It took a long time for the baggage carousal to start, perhaps due to the lateness of our arrival. I suspect we were the last flight of the evening and that they had a skeleton crew. I got my garment bag right away, one of the first bags off the belt.

And waited for a second case that never came. One that they still can't locate. They know it left Pittsburgh and that is all. This is not good. All of my jeans. About $400 worth of boots and shoes. Lots of brand new promo gear, some autographed books, things I had purchased for the costumes, autographed books, gifts for my kids.

Sure, the airline website says they cover losses up to $3000.00. But it takes a minimum of thirty days. Yeah, I'll have to buy a new electric shaver and pants before then, gang. Plus, if I know the way insurance works, you'll want receipts for things I never expected to need receipts for.

The thing that bugs me the worst is that they had an extra 45 minutes to do it in and they still screwed it up.

But I'm not using the name of the airline deliberately, because I'm hoping they will still get the bag to me, and soon. If they have lost it completely? Then I'll drag their name into the mud.

But other than that one issue (which I really didn't think was gonna be such a long rant) the trip was great.

Promo & Partying In Pittsburgh

I thought it was busy and frantic last year, but it turns out that as a first-timer who wasn't presenting, I was wrong. Last year was nothing, crazy though it was.

Craziness is normal at RT. If not in your mind, at least on your schedule.

Romantic Times is the big convention for the romance genre, and while it may not quite reach the nuttiness of ComicCon, it gets wild. As always, I don't feel like I've slowed down since I got here.

It started yesterday with the normal registration lines and elevator overflow. We had to get our promo gear out on promo lane and then I did a panel on e-books and law for EPIC. That was the first time I had been on a panel and it was a very interesting experience. Then we had the Expo. I sold and signed a few books and spent about 15 minutes on camera talking to some folks making a documentary about the Romance industry. If I get ten seconds in the finished film I will be thrilled.

Ellora's Cave hosted a "Golden Age of Hollywood" party that started almost immediately after the expo was cleaned up. Went upstairs and got into tuxedo and danced for hours, with lots of drinking and flirting.

This morning, I helped Alessia set up for Club RT, then was interviewed by the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette. This afternoon I will be signing at All Romance eBooks table for an hour, then doing dinner and coming upstairs to get all pirated out for the Faery Ball.

And of course there will be much drinking, dancing and flirting. *Grin*

The Fool I Couldn't Laugh At...

Abraham Lincoln said, "Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt."

The wisdom of this applies everywhere and I certainly have been able to think of people who should follow it in ballparks, but rarely in quite this manner.

Last night, I went to the ballpark with my Mom, something we do together several times a year. My Mom has been a season ticket holder for the Padres since 1985, so her seats are excellent and we don't often have the people drinking ten beers and screaming obscenities. For one thing, the ushers know to take care of the customers in that section. Jake Peavy owns the tickets directly in front and to the left, so someone yelling how he sucks is going to be politely told not to say so in front of his wife, for example.

But last night, we had Mr. "I'm on a date and I really want to impress her so she will consider me a suitable candidate to impregnate her" sitting behind us. And for nine innings, he could not shut his mouth. I know where he works, I know where he went to college, I know who he rooted for growing up and what he wants to name his firstborn... who, by the way,has no choice but to be male. I know how familiar he is with stripper names and that he thinks anyone who names their son William is foolish because it will get shortened to Billy and "Billy sucks." (Billy sucks as a name worse than Everett, which he wants to name his first born because "if he gives him a bad name to begin with the kid won't get a bad nickname from his peers"... and yes, he really said that.)

Luckily for him, he has a good job and he isn't bad looking. Plus, she wasn't the brightest star in the sky. Still, I did feel like telling him that it wasn't smart to tell the girl you are trying to sleep with that her taste in names for children sucks. And that it might have been wise to let her get a word in edgewise on occasion.

And I wanted to be a good teammate on the guy team. Despite the fact that about 40% of his baseball knowledge was dead wrong, I never turned around and corrected him in front of her. I resisted the urge to block his path... although at one point in my life I might have done it merely to teach him a lesson. That, or cornered him on a trip to the snackbar and told him he was blowing it. By the way, it took him two or three beer runs to realize that they actually serve people in those seats and that the people in uniforms bringing nachos to people seated around him were not family members.

And I held my tongue for nine innings of incessant babble. I even took a picture of them together for him and accepted the title of "new friend." Although I could have warned him that when she fixed the collar on my jacket for me and leaned forward to ask me questions, he was in danger of losing her regard.

Until the ninth inning. Warning to prospective idiots. I will allow you to give misinformation out with authority in search of a bed partner only to a certain extent. Chanting "OOOOver-rrrrated" about the all time saves leader while children around you are screaming with excitement? Talking about how the position of reliever has only existed for "about twelve years" and it's "no big deal" to close a game?

Too much.

I let him have it. I asked him how a no doubt Hall of Famer could be overated? When he said no relievers were in the Hall, I named those who were. I told him (and his girl) who Lee Smith was. I disputed every counterpoint he made for a couple of minutes and then, having exacted my revenge for the previous nine innings, I turned and watched the game. Hoffy got two quick outs, but then a nubber to first base happened to be a single because it basically was not struck hard enough to roll faster than the batter could run. Which prompted renewed posturing from fool boy about how he was right. I gave him one long look. I didn't say anything.

I did notice that when Hoffy struck the next guy out, the girl did a little hop and the half-hand claps that screamed "former cheerleader" and that she was suddenly rooting for what he was rooting against.

And I noticed that he got her out of there in a hurry.

I apologize to my fellow guys, and I do kinda hope that I didn't keep him from getting laid. But friends, please...

Before you chatter incessantly for nine innings in front of the girl you are trying to impress... listen to Mr. Lincoln.

A Parts List Is NOT Instructions...

...or, Why I Am Taking This Shirt Back.

Now, I'm not the snazziest dresser in the world. But I do consider myself to be in the top 30% of my somewhat clueless gender. Said clues being specific to the idea of what looks good. Not the other side of clothing, the one most men get and many women don't. See, you don't need to explain to a man that you can't wear a Red Sox hat with a Yankee jersey, even though they are both baseball things...

No, I'm talking about colors and patterns, and more importantly how colors and patterns relate to the person wearing them. Because my biggest challenge in the fashion area is one of knowing the difference between "That shirt looks good" and "That shirt makes ME look good."

Now I have done some research. That is where the title of this post originates. For example, I have listened when a girlfriend/wife/female friend has made certain comments in the past about what colors or patterns look good on me. And I have noticed certain female reactions to certain garments and tried to then take the next step and extrapolate the characteristics of those garments to other purchases.

But sometimes I put them together in the wrong way. For example, this shirt I need to take back. It's blue... okay, I have been told multiple times that blue brings out my eyes and is a good color for me. It's a lighter blue, and this played a part because I know I have plenty of dark blue things so I don't need more dark shirts. It's a dress-style shirt, and I have received plenty of feedback that lets me know I look good in those. But here's where I made the disconnect and didn't realize that putting together a list of parts didn't equal instructions. It's plaid.

Now,I have green plaid and even a red/blue plaid shirt that I have gotten compliments on, I always get complimented on my kilt, and I remember that girlfriends always used to be fond of my flannel shirts.

So, I buy the plaid in varying shades of blue and bring it home. Along with a few other shirts, because I'm at a place where some old favorites have acquired a coffee stain or the collar is fraying, etc. And because I don't have a woman here locally, I get out the camera and snap some mirror photos to send to Alessia. Because one lesson that HAS stuck is that it is always good to get a female nod of approval.

And in this case, it's a good thing. Everything else I bought, she liked. Grey striped dress shirt, tan polo, blue polo... all good. But the blue plaid that I thought I did so well matching to the parts list? Not so much. Thankfully, I am getting better even at this part. Because when I put the shirt on to photograph it, I kinda went "blah."

Now, if only I could learn to make that jump without buying it first, then I might have something.

The Song Remains The Same

In the month since I addressed anything political on this blog, many things have changed. John McCain has clinched the Republican nomination and Barack Obama has opened a delegate lead that some call insurmountable. But one thing that hasn't changed is the rhetoric of Obama's democratic opponent.

In comments today, Hilary Clinton once again trotted out her line about needing to do more than make speeches. Apparently, she is really worried about her oratory abilities compared to Obama's, because for the last six weeks she has been harping on this.

As I said in the post in mid-February, making speeches and the ability to do so well actually is very important for a President. No, it is not all that the job entails. But it is a crucial aspect of the position. If you were hiring someone to be President, it would be one of the major qualifications. Must be willing to relocate, able to work unusual hours, have strengths in networking and be an accomplished public speaker.

But today Hilary popped off about it again. "Senator Obama has said often that words matter. I strongly agree. But giving speeches alone won't end the war and making campaign promises you might not keep certainly won't end it," Clinton said.(Reuters)

The wonderful irony is in her other comments on the same day. For example, she promised if elected she would convene military advisers and ask them to develop a plan to begin bringing U.S. troops home within 60 days of her taking office next January.

Now, lets examine this statement from Ms. Empty Speeches Accusation. What is she actually promising? To bring the troops home in sixty days? No, that's what she wants you to hear. The only thing she's actually promising is to have a meeting on the subject of doing so. How wonderfully Washingtonian of her. Isn't this exactly what we want a change from?

She also made a point of talking about how the war is so bad for the economy (Duh!) and costly in human misery. Funny that she didn't think this way in September, 2002. Oh, but everybody voted for the war then, right? Wrong. The majority of Democrats in the House and twenty-one Democratic Senators did NOT vote for the war then. Of course, Hilary couldn't have afforded to vote against the war as the Senator from New York. I get that. But she could at least say so. I might respect that. No, she continues to paint that vote as the right thing to do at the time, basically refusing to admit that it is possible for her to make a mistake. Gee, sounds like the President we already have, not the one we want.

She also talks about how the war could cost a trillion dollars (Hey Hillary, get current. Recent estimates are double that number)and about how much that money could do here in the United States. Funny, I seem to have heard that before. Where? In speeches Obama made in Iowa, New Hampshire, Nevada, South Carolina and most especially in Katrina ravaged New Orleans.

Her other big use for the money? Solving the housing crisis and making college affordable. Well, Hilary may not value Obama's speeches... but it sure sounds like she has been listening to them.

Refresh my memory, Hilary. What was all that about plagiarism?

Take A Leap With Phaze!

We like to do things the hard way, don't we? Inches, miles, and all that ridiculous pints-quarts-gallons stuff. On the Gregorian calendar, which we use, we have to add a day every so often. At least in the year thing, it is not about our refusal to switch to that simple metric system.

Adding an extra day to the calendar every four years compensates for the fact that a solar year is almost 6 hours longer than 365 days.

So, in the spirit of starting a tradition that we don't have to mess with that often, Phaze is celebrating Leap Day with a special sale and Take a Leap Giveaway, with two ways to win!

All through Leap Day, Feb. 29, 2008, you can get 29% off all eBooks in the Phaze store using the checkout code LEAP2008. When you purchase a title from the Phaze.com catalog on Leap Day you will be eligible to win one of two Phaze.com gift certificates valued at $29 each.

You can also enter the drawing by sending an e-mail to leapyear@phaze. com with your Name, E-Mail Address, and one sentence describing the best way to "take a leap" on this extra day.

How would spend your Leap Day: an actual "leap" with a bungee cord
attached your ankles, or a metaphorical "leap" toward an exciting new job
or romance? Let us know; we'll post the answers we like best on our blog.

All entries for the giveaway must be in by midnight, Feb. 29, 2008 to be
eligible. No purchase necessary to win!

This Is Just Nasty... And Funny

So I'm suffering through about the nastiest bout with the annual creepin' crud I can remember. I got sick once last year, but it was nothing like this. I can't remember my throat ever being this sore. (( And that is NOT meant as innuendo, people!!))

And Jimmy Kimmel and Sarah Silverman made it worse with their little competition. If you don't know what I'm talking about, Google their names plus Matt Damon.

It hurts to laugh with a sore throat, damn it!